Varying Values

I’ve never been very good at math. When I was in High School I called the college I was going to and asked them how much math I needed to get in and took exactly that much. I struggled through Algebra II. So now I am going to attempt to make a table full of values, fortunately there are no numbers involved.

When we were at camp last weekend, I had the chance to sit in on one of my husband’s sessions thanks to the amazing kids program that had my kids busy clowning around and one crying herself to sleep out of fear.

We were talking about values and he had everyone make a list of what their values were pre-deployment, during deployment and post-deployment. It was really interesting to listen to them as they shared the shift in perspective they experienced.

While everyone was writing, I decided to do my own values list based on my experiences pre-motherhood, during motherhood and post-motherhood. I know I will never truly be post-motherhood, I was thinking empty nest phase.

I already realize that my values have changed from my early years of parenting to now and I know they’ll continue to change. I’m guessing on the post-mommy list since I’m not there yet. Maybe someone has perspective on that? Why does it feel like we don't get the wisdom we need until it's too late?

Pre-Mommy	Active Mommy	Post-Mommy ?
Education (mine)	Physical Safety	Immediate Family
Looks: physical and to how I look to others	Money: for giving kids stuff and ease of living, nice house	Relationships: more about who I am than what I do or look like
Prestige: Money, Car, Job	Education (kids) - school, lessons, sports, religious
Extended Family	Extended Family
Friends	Prestige: How kids dress, look and act
Wanting to get on with my life	Wanting to get on with my life
	Sleep!

The first thing that came to my mind was not God. It was all pretty selfish. If God were going to make a list, I’m thinking it would look really different. I want to use this as an opportunity to pray that God will give me the right values, attitudes, heart and perspective in life and mothering. It’s so hard to push out the things my selfish little self wants. The only place I always find what I need is in the loving and faithful arms of my heavenly father.

Trust me, no one needs a better attitude and perspective on the Active Mommy phase than me. Just today it’s been filled with hair-pulling, fighting, talking back, demanding, whining, clingy, crying children. Yep, perspective is desperately needed.

Jeremiah 29:11-13

"For I know the plans I have for you” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”

Romans 8:28

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:37-39

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who love us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels or demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.