Saturday, September 03, 2011

It’s the Middle of a Holiday weekend, but…

this is important. I can fully admit that I am a cynic when it comes to “Christian” stuff. I was raised in the world of Christian radio and hymn sings and it was all good. But sometimes I am just a little stand-offish with cliché Christian stuff. Unfortunately, I think my cynisim mainly amounts to pride.

Last week, a friend invited me to an event on FaceBook. It’s the kind of thing I usually roll my eyes at, a 30 Day Husband Challenge. This friend is one of the least cheesy, cliché Christian people I can think of. She’s just plain awesome. So I checked it out. I wanted to click that I would join but I couldn’t. Is it even possible to go one month without saying anything negative to or about my husband? That just seems like crazy talk.

I don’t want to be pushed out of my comfort zone and give more in my marriage. Because seriously, how much more can I be expected to give?

Let me ask you, have you had the experience of seeing a marriage break up that just knocked your socks off? I mean there are some marriage splits that are not shocking at all. Maybe even expected. Then there are marriages that implode when they seem like they were rock solid. Do you know what I wonder in cases like that? How does that happen and how do I make sure it doesn’t happen to me?

I haven’t forgotten that we’ve had some implosions in our own marriage that without the grace of God could have ended the same way. We have mini implosions more often than I would like to admit. But for the most part, things are good. We are more romantic and spend more time alone thanks to some of our kids being babysitting age now. We are doing all the “right” things. But that isn’t always enough.

After trying to avoid the “challenge”, I decided to do it. I signed up for the emails. And day one: epic fail. I do mean epic. Some of the anger and frustration I’ve been dealing with that are totally unrelated to my marriage came to the surface and it wasn’t pleasant. Really? Day one of the stinkin’ challenge to encourage my husband and I go on an all-out rant.

As Mike and I were talking today, we realized that the truth is we are all just a step or two away from implosion. Bitterness and resentment build into a nasty storm. Frustration breeds anger and annoyance.

The key seems to be in not acting on or giving in to those emotions. I had thoughts of taking off for the weekend or at least making his life miserable for a while. It sometimes takes time for me to get my head back on straight. We had a long and difficult and honest chat last night instead of pretending everything was a-ok. That was our old way.

It helps to just own the fact that we are not perfect and neither is our marriage. So I’m going to press on with the challenge even though I’m cynical. And a huge failure. And lots of other things I’d rather not list here.

We’re all in the line of fire if we are married. Satan does not want us to succeed. It’s hard work. Sometimes one or two things that aren’t even that big of a deal can make us snap.

I want to encourage you to join me in encouraging. Here’s the link to Revive Our Hearts. I want to move away from an implosion, not towards it. I think this is a good start.

Friday, September 02, 2011

September

When school is done

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and summer has come

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It’s a relief to be free

of the grind of getting up early

It’s nice to be lazy

and a little bit crazy

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and play with our Daisy

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But once September rolls around

we’re ready for routine and organization to abound

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there’s something sweet about getting supplies

and trying to be somewhat organized

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Just to be sure you are not alone

It’s necessary to talk to your friends on the phone

(and have your mom not post pictures of  it on her blog)

Who doesn’t love new pencils sharpened just rightDSCF7509

but zip drives and calculators are sort of a fright

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Ok, who snuck the X-Men movie into the cart? 

Don’t tell me that was on the list in any part

The weather is getting cool

and we’re ready for school

Monday, August 29, 2011

I Hate Goodbyes.

I hate goodbyes.  If I never have to see one of these

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in front of a friend’s house again it would be too soon.  Unless it’s because they are moving in next door to me.  The house next door is for sale, by the way.  It might be the perfect start to our commune!

This is the second time this summer we’ve said goodbye to dear friends.  I don’t handle emotion very well so I stay busy and ignore the people I am sad are moving.  It’s not like you help people move because you love lifting heavy stuff and cleaning.  If you did that you would be a professional mover.  You do it because of the love you have for them and the desire to be around them just a little longer before they must go.

This morning we were on our way to help our friends load up and I had that icky feeling in my stomach.  But I had my magic rag and mop in hand and got right to work cleaning up as they loaded.

But the time comes when you have to leave and say goodbye.  I’ve decided it’s okay to cry although I fight it so hard my whole face turns beat red.  And summer moves are great because I’m usually wearing sunglasses.

Sometimes we have to say goodbye forever when we lose someone we love to death, not just a move.  When God created man, we were meant to live forever.  In the Garden of Eden there was no death or pain until sin came into the world.  We weren’t made for goodbyes.

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”  Ecclesiastes 3:11

All I could think about today was how I can’t wait for heaven.  There will be no goodbyes there.  All of us that believe in Jesus will be there together.  We’ll have the closeness we long for.  Forever worshipping our Savior.  No pain and no tears and no death. 

And I head a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and He will live with them.  They will be his people and God himself will be with them and be their God.  He will wipe ever tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”  Revelation 21:3-4

 

I long for that day.  For Jesus to come back.  For all of us to be together, forever. 

Because I hate goodbyes.

My Standards

I was never an animal lover.  I used to refuse to go to the chicken swap.  But my kids love animals.  Apparently, I’m a total pushover.

We went to the chicken swap this weekend.  They have puppies, bunnies, chickens and real maple syrup.  Fortunately for me and unfortunately for Annie, they didn’t have any turtles there.

How do you say no to this?  Seriously.

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Don’t worry, I did.  I may be cruel and heartless.  And cheap.

We also didn’t buy a bunny because I think one is enough for right now.  They should be thrilled I think that because honestly in my mind, none is the perfect number.

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If we get two before we get a second cage, we could have twenty-two before long.  Did you know that the gestation period for rabbits is like 30 seconds days?  I learned that from a six year old.

I learned at the chicken swap that there are monthly rabbit meetings.  Really.  I'll waste no time getting those on my calendar.  That way, a six year old can shame me with all the amazing things they know.  About rabbits. 

I shudder to accept the fact that we are probably joining 4H.  Because we need one more thing to do.  And because my kids want to learn about all this and I haven’t a blessed clue.

Although I am softening on the animal thing a bit, there is one hard and fast rule in our house.

We don’t

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allow dogs

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on the furniture.

I’ve got to have some standards.