Tuesday, July 28, 2009

It's Not All Fun and Sunshine

Boy the last couple days have been rough. I realize that I have nothing to complain about yet I still manage to find a way. We are coming off two very intense weeks of activity. I was looking forward to a quieter week but now I have my doubts.

We had some work to do in the garden this morning. So while we were weeding away, Maren tried to help out with the fertilizing process. I went in to clean up that mess and while I was at it, the other kids came in crying and yelling at each other; something about a disagreement and a kick in the stomach. I was in no mood. I haven't even showered in longer than I'd like to admit. I've cleaned up more potty training messes than I can count. And the kids seem to find great enjoyment in fighting and bugging each other.

I realized there is a problem with my last post because even if you have something outside of your marriage and family that keeps you challenged, you still have to come back at some point. This week, I'm tired of dealing with it all. I want to have a nice, quiet day at home and they are bored. We try to go out and they bicker. I cannot win.

So I end up a little frustrated and feeling sorry for myself. What's a mom to do?

One thing I know for sure is that when we are coming off a big, exciting week like camp or VBS we are going to crash. There will be crabbiness, readjusting and boredom.

The quiet and down times are my chance to get back on track, slowing down the pace of my life. I am forced into saying no to things. There are a lot of things I'd like to do but they make my time divided and it ends up leaving me feeling frazzled.

On good days, when I'm taking everything in stride I think I've got it covered on my own. The good news is when I know I can't handle it, it always brings me to my knees. In order to shepherd my flock, I need to follow the Good Shepherd.

While I was on my walk last night, I was praying again for help embracing this job. There are times when it isn't that joyful and I feel like I'm doing a lousy job. No matter what my job is there will be ups and downs, messes and tantrums. I just don't have the option of quitting this one.

Isaiah 40:11
He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.

2 comments:

Steph VG said...

Dear Webfriend...

Thank you for YOUR honesty. I will be praying more specifically for you now. May our faithful God continue to strengthen you for the calling with which you have been called, and may you glory in your Redeemer, who knows you by name, and is interceding before our Father on your behalf.

Steph

lifebythehandful said...

I am where you are right now. VBS ended on Saturday, my house is thrashed, the kids are fighting, I'm tired, and I'm looking forward to the day when the only hind-end I will be wiping is my own. I needed the reminder of this verse to know that He is in control of this crabby old ewe with a flock of her own. Thanks.