Saturday, July 25, 2009

Confessions of a Wanna Be Runner

It all started a few years ago when I desperately needed to get out of the house. Every night when Mike got home. Every night. I started walking in an attempt to get away, stamp out my frustrations and maybe lose some baby weight. Soon, I started dabbling in running. I've been running on and off for a few years now, mostly OFF. I just don't always have the time or energy to get it in. So this spring while I was walking with my friend Eva we decided we'd sign up for a 5k to motivate ourselves. My Dad happened to be in town so he ran it with us.

Eva and I were pretty nervous. I went to the shoe store to get some new shoes and the little runner girl helping me said she was running the same 5k. I kind of thought it would be more backwoods runners. I was hoping for sickness or a thunderstorm so I could get out of it gracefully. But the day came and we both made it. Finishing was our goal.

My neighbors decided to run/walk it as a family at the last minute. As the girls were coming in, they we already loading the clock in the truck and had taken down the finish line. But they did it - and that's what it's all about.

It wasn't that great for my self-esteem to have my kids tell me that their friends, who are 2nd and 4th graders, came in before me, but they do come from a running family. I was just glad I was still running, not bleeding or crying.

It's been a long time since I did something out of my comfort zone. Something I wasn't sure I could do as well as I wanted. In my life as a mommy I am so bogged down with kids and house and spouse that it's easy to lose confidence in trying things. I used to be much more adventurous. Now I worry about safety and routine.

It's just harder to do something new. I don't like to run sometimes because I feel like people are looking at me and thinking "what a loser!"

Being fulfilled as a Mom takes putting Christ first. Only He can give me the peace, contentment and energy to do my job. I'm not a big believer in "me time". God wants me to serve and serve. I'm always at the bottom of the list and that's good for me. I'm a selfish person by nature and that's what I need to do for my family. I have to squeeze exercise in when I can. But it has been great to have an outlet and a challenge.

Maybe your challenge will be reading books that don't have "cat" or "hat" in them. Maybe it could be taking up a craft or hobby. You could join a MOPS group or Bible study for support and encouragement. Perhaps bike riding to the park with the kids or walking with a friend. (Walking with a friend is the best because the time just flies by!) How about taking a class? Mike and I took a community education dance class this winter. That was out of our comfort zone and routine, but it was really fun.

As long as I don't let it take away my focus on my number one job as a wife and mom. If I decided I should train for a marathon(insert laughter here) and started running 6 hours a day that would not be a challenge or outlet, that would be an escape. There's a difference.

Allowing myself to try new things and change keeps my life from becoming boring, frustrating and sad. Step outside, get away from the laundry and dishes and diapers; do something different and challenging.

1 Corinthians 9:24
Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

Hebrews 12:11
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

1 comment:

Carolyn said...

I totally understand. I tried to start running 2 years ago, between having more babies. Running is hard! But I like the idea of training for a race and then completing a race. Good luck with your goals!