Saturday, January 05, 2008

Basketball

Grant is playing basketball again. It has taken a step up in intensity this year. More practices and tournaments on Saturdays. I thought he wanted to play but apparently I didn't discuss it with him because he hates it and wants to quit. I know that he is not going to be a team sports kind of guy long term but we thought it would be good for him to do something active and he might grow to like it. It's a fun sport you can keep playing into adulthood.

The first sign of trouble was one night in December when I went to pick him up at practice. They just aren't a competitive group of boys. One of them was heard saying before a game, "I can't wait to go home and try my new Axe shampoo!" Grant pretty consistently has his hands in his jersey and skips around the court. He just doesn't care! I don't consider myself to be a competitive person, but watching today was just painful! They lost by more than 20 points. When I got to the gym today, (the girls and I didn't make it to the first game) I saw Grant and expected to hear "We Won!" or "We lost", but instead I heard a breakdown of what he had eaten at the snack bar!

I feel torn about whether we should let him quit or not. Both Mike and I feel like we should make him finish out the season (although my resolve is weakening!) There isn't a lot left of the season and there are not a lot of kids in his age group so they kind of need all the bodies they can get! Is there value in finishing what you started? I think there is - it is good to learn to see things through.

But at the same time, as a Mom I feel like I don't want to value "finishing" over my child's gifts, uniqueness and desires. Isn't that important too? Letting them try things and in the process discovering who they are?

Ultimately, I will follow Mike's lead on this one. A few more weeks won't hurt him. I'm just not sure what the more valuable lesson is!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good to have you back Michelle! I've been checking your blog over the last month or so and I was sooo excited to see some new blogs. I can completely relate to how hard it is to put a sentence together as well so don't feel bad for not blogging. Just wanted to let you know how much I love to read what's going on in your home and heart. Jenn

Christy said...

It's a tough one. My first reaction is that the life lesson of "sticking it out" is overrated. It was one that I was taught, and there have been many times when I've applied it and it has bombed. But then I think of the big things such as marriage and jobs and think that "sticking it out" is probably a valuable thing to teach.

Michelle said...

At last we reached the end of the season and everyone is happy! But I do think it was a good thing to have him finish. Now he is in Karate and very happy.

I read in my Good Housekeeping an article by Dr. Phil and his wife. I'm not a fan of his. I haven't seen his show and I don't really know anything about him. But his wife said that one thing she learned is that there are some things a Dad needs to teach his son. She used the exact example of quitting a sports team. She didn't think it was a big deal, he wanted to teach him to finish what he started. It is a good lesson to learn. I'm so glad Mike and I are on the same page as Dr. Phil!