Well, I did it. I sent Grant and Jenna off on the bus this morning back to school. On Friday, Abby will start pre-school. It seemed sad for summer to come to an end. We've been together so much (not always a good thing) and have had so much fun! Now they are under other people's authority and influence for 8 hours of their day. So am I letting go? I think God is just loosening my grip little by little.
It really all starts the first time you hold your new baby and realize there are things that are out of your control. The nurse comes and takes the baby away to the nursery and the grip lessens. Then they roll, crawl, walk and talk. Little by little they are leaving our grasp. They get involved in activities, with friends and would rather play in their room by themselves. I suppose as time marches on they will get jobs, go to college and date (scary thought!)
I don't think it's a bad thing though, I want them to grow up to be productive adults and maybe it's God's graciousness that takes them away just a bit at a time so my heart can adjust. But as I let them take those steps away from me, it seems like they are walking into the dark world and God has to pry my fingers off of them. However, I think they are ultimately walking towards Christ. They must leave us at times to grow, be challenged and be hurt so they can establish their own relationship with Christ. Not Mommy and Daddy's faith but their own authentic relationship with Jesus.
I'm not sure why I have such a hard time turning them over to Jesus at any given stage. Why I think I can love and guide them better than Him is beyond me. Jesus loves them even more than I do - and that's hard to imagine because I love them so much it hurts. But He does and He is always with them. He is in control of their lives not me. And that is a good thing!
So, whether you are watching your infant crawl or beginning a new year of homeschooling or home all the time with pre-schoolers there's always a new stage and the progression of life. We've got to begin to let go and guide them straight to Jesus - he'll never let go!
John 10:27-30
"My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father's hand. I and the Father are one."
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