Holding On and Letting Go, Part Three

How are we supposed to know if we are holding on to and letting go of the wrong things?  I think it takes a different vision.  We have to get our eyes off of the here and now and look to eternity.  If we could have an eternal, birds-eye perspective of the things we go through in this life it might change what we hold on to.

It's kind of like Monday morning quarter backing or coaching.  I'm sure tomorrow all the Vikings fans will be second guessing Frasier's decision to not go for two or some of Ponder's moves.  It's easy to see now that we know the outcome. 

When I was in High School I was involved in student council.  One of the jobs we did was planning Sno Daze, the winter festival.  We had royalty from each grade that were crowned at a pepfest on Friday during school.  This was a big school with thousands of kids.

So during the pepfest we had teachers crowning the winners.  For some reason, we didn't have it written down so we were just telling them who to crown which in retrospect seems really, really stupid.  It all was going along famously until we crowned the seniors.  We told them to crown "Molly", but unfortunately there was also a girl on the court named "Mari".  You can see how in a loud gym full of high school kids that mistake could be made.  And we crowned the wrong girl!

 After it happened, I felt like the world stopped.  We all kind of freaked.  Then someone suggested that we didn't really need to say anything.  Who would ever know? 

Until someone aptly remembered the Sno Daze edition of the school paper was being handed to students on the way out of the pepfest.  On the front page were the pictures of all the winners.  So, Molly was robbed of her crowning moment.  I think the whole dance line wanted to kill us.  And it seemed horrible.  Really, really horrible.  To the seventeen year old me, it was the end of the world.

Is that how our earthly worries and comings and goings will look through eternal eyes?  I know that's not a perfect example.  The things we go through here can be hard, horrible and sad.  But instead of grasping on to the gracious love of Jesus, we let go.  We walk away and lose heart.  Small decision, by small decision turn to our own way.  We hold on to the ways of the world; materialism, selfishness, immorality and other things when we should be holding on to Jesus.

2 Corinthians 4: 16-18 says,

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

When Paul wrote this, he was suffering.  He suffered a lot through his life and ministry.  He was beaten, imprisoned, persecuted and shipwrecked.  I wouldn't exactly call those light and momentary troubles.  But as he kept his gaze fixed on Jesus and the world beyond this he realized it was nothing.  He was looking toward eternal glory.

I am usually so bogged down dealing with laundry and cooking and people and even church stuff that my eyes are not fixed on what is unseen.  If I could allow God to change my vision through more time in the Bible, I think it would be abundantly clear what to hold on to and what to let go of.

Holding on and Letting Go, Part Two

While we were on vacation this summer, I found myself standing in the closet of every woman’s dreams.  Shelves of shoes and purses.  And drawers full of jewelry.  The owner of this fabulous closet was showing us the shopping bags she brought in while there were fires burning near her house. 

The idea was that if the house was going to burn, she’d go into the closet and start shoving as much jewelry as possible into the shopping bags.  In the same thought she realized it’s too much!  Just let it burn.

When I got home to my own house, I started wondering what I would want to hold on to.  I honestly couldn’t think of much I would care about in my house except the pictures.  Everything else is old, broken or easily replaceable.

However, there are certainly other things in my life that I hold on to.  All this got me thinking that we often hold on to the things we should be letting go of and let go of the very things we should be holding on to.

I am embarrassed to admit how bad my judgment is on such matters.  I hold on to my rights, my opinions, my anger, my time, my money, my kids and my wants like they’re a life preserver.

Equally shocking, I easily let go of prayer, Bible study, commitments, faithfulness, forgiveness and fellowship as if they are of minimal importance.

It seems I have it all backwards.  The things that we need to hold on to are not going to make sense in this world.  It would be like being in the basement during a fire, throwing old potatoes in a shopping bag while letting the fine jewelry and dishes and art to the flames.

Just like we have to let go of the monkey bar to move to the next rung, we have to let go of the things this world values.  Are we holding on to the right things?

I’m not so sure.  I think I might have it all backwards.

“I have learned that faith means trusting in advance what will only make sense in reverse”  Philip Yancey

What I mean, brothers and sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not; those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep;  those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.

1 Corinthians 7:29-31

Holding On and Letting Go, Part One

This has been such a great summer.  We’ve travelled, slept in, spent a lot of time at the beach and watching movies.  I’ve enjoyed it so much.

Maybe I partially cherished it just a little extra because I knew today was coming.  The day when all the babies would finally get super fun to hang around.  They sleep at night and like the same shows as I do.  And just when they get super wonderful, semi-helpful and downright fabulous to be around, they have to go to school.

This year for the first time, all of the kids in our house went to school.  I’ve been telling people all year that I’m fine and ready to move on to the next stage, which I am.  Totally I am more than ready.  But this weekend that nagging feeling kept creeping up on me. 

I’m ready to move on, but it’s just so hard letting go.  Just like when you learn to do the monkey bars and you have to let go to grab on to the next one.  It’s a little scary.  I would rather just hang on the bar I already had a good grip on.  I was happy and comfortable there. 

(Google Images)

So it seem that being ready to move on, implies the fact that we must let go.  Today I got up at 6:00 a.m.  What a horrible time to wake up.  I was liking the 8 or 8:30 we got up to in the summer.  We got everyone fed, dressed and ready to roll.

Maren was so excited for kindergarten.

She did her own hair.  I’ve trained her to be independent like that.

They all came out for the obligatory picture.

And then they were gone.  After 13 years of wondering if I would ever get a moments peace or get to go to the bathroom by myself, the house was quiet.  I have to say quiet wasn’t so bad.  It was actually kind of nice.

Then I played for a while.  I caught up with a friend.  I ate a lot of pizza here.

And I walked to my favorite candy shop for dessert.

I got home in time to see happy faces get off the bus and bike back down the driveway.

That’s right, my kindergartner can ride a two wheeler.

Even though letting go can be hard, it seems that life is pretty good on the next monkey bar too.  If I never let go, I’ll never get to grab onto the next ones!  And that would be a crying shame.

This Doesn’t Look Like Disney World

It’s always fun to dream about where to go on vacation.  Maybe somewhere warm and sunny or rustic with mountains.  I’ve pinned and researched all sorts of fabulous trips.  We could visit Mickey or relax in Mexico.

It plays out perfectly in my head and on my Pinterest board.  A happy family, singing in the car, dressed in matching Mount Rushmore T-shirts.  Ok scratch the shirts.  That’s too cheesy even for my dream.

But in reality it usually turns into a bad scene from a Chevy Chase movie.  And then the biggest bubble popper of all…the budget.

We had some ideas of places we wanted to go this summer and it just wasn’t possible.  We did end up going to my parents in Colorado at the last minute.  It’s not exactly Disney World or Alaska or Glacier National Park, but one night as I was walking around the block chatting with one of my kids I realized something important.

Vacation is less about where we go and more about who we’re with.  Wherever we are, when we get a chance to slow down, get away from the norm, and have more time with our family that’s what makes a great vacation.

I’m thankful for the walks we had around the block and hikes through Garden of the Gods. The talks along the highway. All things we don’t have the luxury of in the hustle and bustle of real life.

That can be accomplished at home or wherever your roam.  In Alaska or at Disney world or Grandma’s or the local KOA. 

It’s about people not place. It’s about experience, not expense.   And it’s about time not about tourism.  It’s about connecting, not conquering. 

Heart Champs

It’s back to school time.  And for many kids and parents it’s also time to gear up for sports.  There are try outs, cuts, people who don’t make the level they want.  There are bench warmers and starters. 

I’m super glad that as an adult runner I don’t have to care about that stuff.  Because I am never embarrassed to share my time from a race.  Umm or come in behind someone I clearly should have been better than.  Or an 65 year old speed walker.  I mean I am totally ok with that.  So I may be a teeny little bit more competitive than I thought. 

But truly, for the most part, I run in races just for fun.  I know I won’t win.  Well, maybe a little part of me hoped I might be able to take Kara Goucher in the Grandma’s Half this year.  Bwahaha! 

But if just little old slow me can get competitive, is it a surprise kids on sports teams are?  Or their parents?

It’s hard to know who is worse really.  If you mess with me or my goals or my times, I might be annoyed, but if you mess with my kids…get ready for mama bear baby!

I’m already hearing and reading a lot of great things about the young athletes in our world.  No doubt there are a lot of talented kids out there.

So even though athletics are great and kids can learn a lot through them and stay fit, let’s not get carried away.  Because what is the most important thing in life?  Is it winning or being the best?

Not if you are a Christian.  As a parent, I want to raise champions of the heart.  I want to encourage humility, faithfulness, hard work, peace and love.  Those are things that will last and count for eternity.  Being the mom screaming from the bleachers at a basketball game is not the way to go about that.  Not that I would know.

A few years ago when our kids were in baseball, we had to play the same team three times.  They were three hundred times better than us.  Or so it seemed.  Their coach was a jerk and would run up the score.

The final time we played them, Mike and I were not watching as encouraging builders of heart champs.  As we stepped back from that game we realized this is little league.  They are in grade school.  These other kids are doing great. 

So I have to check my heart first as an “athlete” myself.  Am I competing for the glory of God?  Do I encourage others along the course?  Do I want to win at all costs?

Then I need to check my heart as a parent.  Do I want the best for my kid or for my kid to be the best?  What other lessons can we learn besides winning?  How about some of the fruit of the Spirit?  Wouldn’t sports be great with a little love, joy, peace, patience and humility?

At the end of the day, I care about my kids’ hearts.  I want them to be following and reflecting Jesus.  It means more than the score or the finish or the place on the team. That’s what Champions of the heart are made of. 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  Against such things there is no law.  Galatians 5:22-23